making arrangements

I sit here this evening writing this post having been a victim again of a strange aspect of Panama.

A really nice colleague had suggested we go together one weekend evening to try one of the jazz bars in the old city, and we’d agreed to make it this evening.  I’d given her details of some venues with live jazz or bossa nova to let her decide where we should go, and she was to email me today to let me know where and when to meet.  & I’ve heard nothing.  She’s not replying to her mails nor to phone calls.  I know that if I ask her on Monday what happened, there will be an excuse given; if I don’t ask she will never even mention it.

It has happened to me before with a colleague, and has happened three times with different commercial appointments.  A colleague referred me to a woman who fits window blinds; I met her and we arranged a day when she would come round to measure up, I arranged to work from home that day and then I waited ... and waited.  She never came and never contacted me to apologise or explain what happened.  The same with two guys who were supposed to come round to replaster a rotting wall last month.  Once I managed to get someone to turn up - a carpenter who measured up to make a bookcase, discussed the type of wood I wanted and gave me a rough price estimate - but then I never heard from him again and I've got used to the books living in a cardboard box beside my bed.

I can understand someone cancelling on me if they are ill, or their car breaks down, or even if they just get a better offer, but I do expect them to tell me.  An expat colleague says she has even experienced Panamanians not turning up when invited to her home for dinner.  Of course one of the interesting things about living overseas is the opportunity to learn about and experience other cultures first hand, but this is one aspect of Panamanian culture that I don't get.

It is something that expats here discuss quite a lot as none of us understand it and few of us ever really come to terms with it.